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Cheezburger Network Blog
True, do you know what else it’s true: I’M FIRST
Word up!
Wörd
Up!
“side boob” that is all.
No! I always thought the oil spill would suck that much.
but it’s a PANDEMIC! EVERYONE PANIC! QUICK EVERYONE FLOOD HOSPITALS SO THEY CAN’T OPERATE PROPERLY!
*cries* Please…don’t mention the oil spill. It makes me dad.
mmd
Since when oil spill make women pregnant?
Since boats cleaning up the spill at night sound horns to warn each other against collisions, waking up people on shore, and they can’t get back to sleep and so have nothing better to do to pass the time than have sex.
Same goes for neighborhoods with loud trains going by at night signaling at crossings. Yes, there have been studies over why certain neighborhoods have higher birth rates than others. This was the cause for some areas.
Have an Internet.
How does it make you a dad?
Pregnancy followed by a sex change.
well the the cant sell you an anidote (with worse reaction as the actual disease) against oil spills
Um, what? The media went NUTS with the oil spill. A few weeks ago, the media’s consensus was that the oil spill at the very least would reach around Florida and hit the east coast. I even saw reports that estimated the oil would reach Australia. If that’s not fear-mongering, I’m not sure what is.
Let’s see:
number of people dead from the oil spill: 25,000
area effected by oil spill: several coastal states and people who want to vacation there.
area effected by the swine flu: the whole world.
Oil spill capped and clean up in progess
People still getting and dying from swine flu
I think you might be just a tad bit wrong.
You didn’t count the people who died from swine flu.
Guess how many? It’s about the same number of people who die from any other flu. Also, you didn’t even take into account the environmental impact or number of people who lost their jobs from the oil spill.
I’m sorry buddy, but i have no idea where you get your facts. 25,000 people did not die from the oil spill. 11 were killed in the explosion, 17 injured and 2 were later found dead in related cases. There were a small amount of suicides due to financial issues, but they shouldn’t be counted because people who even lose a lot like that still shouldn’t commit suicide.
On another note, everyone swarms to the fact that someone messed up and an oil spill happened that caused a small environmental mishap. Yet no one even thinks about the explosion of Eyjafjallajökull, the volcano in Iceland, the erupted several times and spewed more noxious gas and fumes and ash into the air that caused a far greater environmental problem than anything we’ve ever done.
Yeah, high pressure on the ocean floor caused the pipe to burst, yeah it took BP a while to get it fixed. Yeah, people lost jobs, but they just joined the millions who already lost their jobs from the economy. But we leave behind a bigger carbon footprint every day that greatly supersedes any crisis that happens. So quit listening to a media to blows up every thing much bigger than it is, yet forgets to mention stories that are relevant to the people of the country.
the ocean floor didn’t cause the accident, negligence did
“What do these spacemen want from us? What are we negotiating for?”
“You mean, is it a good deal? Is that what you want to know?”
“Yeah, I want to know.”
“Are you trying to second guess the negotiating team, Bob? Is that it?”
“I just want to know if it’s worth the trouble I’m going through. I don’t want to waste my time if all we’re gonna get out of it is a few pictures of space or something.”
“OK, OK, I’ll tell you. Here, write this down.”
“You got something to write with?”
“I used to have a pretty good pen, Bob.”
“I think I’ve got something. OK. What is it?”
“All right. ‘All the flowers, all the trees, all the little birdies.’ Oh, and ‘All the children.’”
“All right, so what is this all about?”
“Well, it seems like the guys in chemical warfare dumped this stuff in the ocean by mistake. Now, this stuff kills a special algae and that kills this bacteria and it goes right up the food chain. Well, make a long story short, Bob, all life on Earth is going to be dead in 5 years.”
“All life on Earth will be dead in 5 years?”
“Unless we do something about it.”
“OK, what if we do do something about it?”
“Well, then everything will be fine. We just don’t know what to do. So that’s where the UFOs come in, Bob. You see, they’re gonna give us this Good Package which includes the formula that’ll reverse the whole thing. Skip over to the other side and write this down.”
“What’s this?”
“This is what they want. Just write it down. ‘A glass of water.’”
“That’s it?”
“Yep.”
“Do they want anything with the water?”
“Like what?”
“A cracker or something?”
“No, Bob, just the water.”
“What’s this?”
“It’s a vital map to show us where we’re going to pick them up.”
“We’d better not lose this.”
“I’d say, Bob. The whole world would be doomed. Wouldn’t you think?”
…
“Why are people in the CIA trying to stop us from saving the world?”
“Well, they want the Big Gun. You see, the UFOs have weapons, too. They have a big gun that can blow a whole planet away. And there’s a faction
in the agency that is willing to trade for it.”
“If it can blow a whole planet away, who are they going to use it on?
“What do you think, Bob? The Russians.”
“Wait a minute! If it can blow away a planet, that would kill us, too. What about the end of the world?”
“That’s not their problem, Bob. Their job is protecting the United States. Getting the gun is their job.”
“But doesn’t anyone think enough to take in the big picture?”
“I don’t know, Bob. That’s not my department.”
That was a big/long comment.
I don’t get it. Why are people still calling it swine flu when it’s not?
Is there another catchy name for it? “H1N1″ just isn’t cutting it.
As a European (Pole living in Britain) I really don’t care about the oil spill. It’s a bit melodramatic in my opinion, but I don’t really know much about it since no one cares about it in the UK. NO ONE. Seriously.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/special_reports/oil_disaster/
apparently british news like to make special reports about something no one cares about…
…or you are lying
No honestly, no one cares in the UK. Though to be honest, if it was the British coastline and this had happened with an American oil rig, I don’t think America would be particularly bothered.
or indeed a American-English oil rig like BP.
All the hype about the potential for massive flu outbreak made people more prepared, thus fewer were infected. Publicity win.
Has nobody noticed “miskakes” on the y-axis? I gave it 5 stars for this reason alone
The reason Swine Flu/H1N1 wasn’t as bad as they said it was going to be was because a lot of people worked their ass off to make sure of it. It’s like how there was a large effort to make sure that Y2K wasn’t a problem, rather than no one doing anything about anything and magically the problem isn’t a problem any more.
Exactly!
It wasn’t a massive catastrophe because it was dealt with properly!
The BP oil spill really isn’t a big deal either in the grand scheme of the world.
For those of us who got the swine flu… IT WAS A BIG DEAL. Like, worst sickness of my entire life big deal. Excruciating pain big deal. Argh. I’ve had the flu before, it wasn’t nearly as bad as H1N1.
AGREED!!!
I got the swine flu last summer and just a couch is worse! Yes you throw up ounce and you feel like crap but, YOU ONLY HAVE IT FOR A DAY YOU WILL NOT DIE PEOPLE!!!!!!!
George Carlin said people don’t care about the environment, they care about people. For instance, you aren’t trying to save the trees or the whales or the atmosphere, you’re trying to save yourself. Without an environment, you cannot live, you are just being a selfish asshole.
I always thought that was kinda of funny.
That oil spill, and others like it (the recent Canadian born f**k up around the great lakes) are not exaggerated. Climate change, deforestation, selling fresh water, over farming land, over fishing, basically all of that hippie mumbo jumbo nonsense that people would like to cognition-ally diverge from because they are too lazy to change, but too good at heart to be heartless, will eventually make life very hard for our children, and their children.
Wow run on sentence. To say you don’t believe in climate change, is to say you don’t believe in science. To say you don’t believe an oil spoil causes damage to the food chain, is to say you don’t believe science. To say you don’t believe over farming our land is ruining it, is to to say – you get the picture.
People are either really stupid, which I doubt, or have a score of personality disorders manufactured by our society.
Or, as religion works, so does any other belief system. If it is easier to believe everything will be alright, and to diffuse responsibility some higher authority ( if even you don’t want that authority to be higher) is the first reaction to insurmountable and paradoxical issues.
So, if you find a correlation between a belief and God, and a disbelief in the material, real world issues that make up the fabric of what others call reality, don’t be alarmed – it’s just human nature. Someone doesn’t care enough about other people- as Carlin said – to care about the environment, and face up to this simple fact. If we keep going as we are, there won’t be people to believe in a God to save you.
No wait, scratch that, you must be stupid – you and yours will suffer as well. Nevermind.
Did someone just compare a volcanic eruption, which is a natural disaster, to a giant corporate fuck up?
…
I’ll be in my ‘lost faith in humanity’ corner, going fetal.