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Likelihood of Encountering a Screaming Child



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Likelihood of Encountering a Screaming Child

Graph by: radioactivekittens via Graph Jam Builder

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» 74 TPS Reports

  1. Tommy says:

    So true… pretty much anywhere you’d least expect someone to bring a baby… You’ll start to hear crying.

  2. Alison says:

    LOL! This is awesome and so true. But, actually, I think “at the movies” and “during a migraine attack” should be switched.

  3. vervain says:

    “On an airplane” should have been a sizeable slice.

  4. Birdman says:

    Alright, so am I the only one bothered by use of a pie chart to show probability?

  5. Kelly says:

    honestly… either teach your kid how to behave in public, or gtfo!

    • senrath says:

      When I went to see the movie Up, sitting in front of me were some of the worst behaved kids I have ever seen. Worst part is the most their parents did to stop them were half-hearted “sit down”s.

    • Starlinguk says:

      How do you teach your kids how to behave in public when you gtfo?

    • Bah says:

      Seconded. If you can’t control them, don’t bring them.

      Also, it should totally be legal to smack other people’s kids. :P

      • John Wayne Gacy says:

        It’s not? What about killing them and stuffing them in your crawlspace? That’s okay, right?

    • JJ says:

      c’mon, he is a kid..

  6. James the Conquerer says:

    This is stupid. Where’s the punchline?

    Like “at a Chuck E. Cheese’s” = 0%

    Now why would that be, kiddies?

    • Sam says:

      ha! that’s what i was thinking, i guess because you can find them anywhere, they even scream when they’re supposed to be having a good time :P

  7. Anna says:

    It’s almost a given to encounter screaming children in our local Target store….

  8. sacha says:

    eleventh :D

  9. Starlinguk says:

    Anywhere, just before the mother hits him/her and makes him scream even louder.

  10. Robert says:

    was there a punchline? I didn’t see a punchline… *sad face*

  11. YACHT says:

    Was there a joke hidden somewhere in here?

  12. Amelia says:

    In the library should be added. I work in a library and you’d be surprised at how many parents can’t (or won’t) control their children.

    • diva says:

      Especially during a storytime. If I had a dollar for every time I had to read over a screaming toddler… (To be fair, nine out of ten parents will take the kid out of the room when they become restless or cranky. It’s that other 10%…)

  13. Kimberly says:

    This should’ve incorporated a venn diagram somehow, where migraine overlaps with all of the others.

  14. Kaptain says:

    Not only is it likely at a movie, it’s even more likely at an R-rated movie. Seriously, when I went to see Underworld: Rise of the Lycans, there was a family with a crying baby just one or two rows behind me. It hardly stopped at all throughout the entire film, and they made hardly any effort to make it stop.

    • Cowlifornia says:

      so true! they have ratings on the movies for a reason: leave the children with a sitter!

      • Starlinguk says:

        Leave the children with a sitter when you go shopping for clothes too. Or don’t go clothes shopping until the child is old enough, or shop online. You won’t die if you don’t have the latest tank top.

  15. Ellie says:

    In my experience, babies also like to cry a lot in church. -_- At least the church I’m in.

    • Taaroko says:

      I know exactly what you mean. When I’m home for the summer, I attend a family congregation with my parents, and there are at least ten crying children at any given moment. At first, it was really weird to be in a student congregation because it was so quiet.

      • Ellie says:

        Yeah, I go to Idaho for college in the winter, so it’ll be reaaaally weird for me. Pin drop silent the entire time XD

  16. Czernobog says:

    You forgot “in your basement.”

  17. Celes says:

    My family has a theory that no matter where you go, if you are in public, there is ALWAYS an Obligatory Screaming Child. Always.

  18. Jack Bond says:

    Actually I’ve found that a mall food court has a high likelihood of that.

  19. nate says:

    i think “at the movies” should have been last on the key, for more comedic effect.

  20. Schooly says:

    Good GOD people, try to remember: the biggest slice explanation comes LAST! It’s actually funny that way!

  21. MisterDisco says:

    I work at a Theater, yesterday seemed to be official screaming children day, and the parents either didn’t care, or screamed Louder

  22. radioactivekittens says:

    I WISH I would have added “on a plane”! I just went on vacation and had to sit across the aisle from the same screaming kid on BOTH flights! What are the chances???

  23. Bueller says:

    Stupid people taking their kids to a Disney movie!

    • papajon says:

      Too funny!

      Screaming, crying, whining, sassing back, throwing fits; that’s how kids and unfortunately many adults communicate. So to those who don’t like it, quit your belly-aching already! It’s the way humans are.

      • Weasel says:

        Then someone needs to train those humans better.

        Wanna know what happened to me if I sassed back? My mother would slap me. Trust me, it worked.

  24. Erika says:

    A 17 hour flight was probably the worst crying baby experience I’ve endured and therefore, feel that this graph is devoid without “airplane.” I’m also not sure what “upscale” restaurants would ever let a baby through the door. I used to serve and bartend at a fine dining restaurant on top of my day job and would always have anyone wielding a baby sit in a spot where no one else was. If that baby ever opened it’s mouth, you better believe we’d ask them to excuse themselves, but most people just would.

    Babies=not chic.

    • papajon says:

      Wow… I would never set foot in a restaurant that treated people in such a uber snobby nose in the air we are better than you attitude. I’d be much happier with my 6 year old at Mickey D’s any day.

      Wow… what elitist snobbery!

      • M4ce says:

        What, because some people find screaming at the top of your lungs in a restaurant to be socially unacceptable?

        It doesn’t matter that they’re a baby. The screaming is just as unpleasant and preventable.

        • Erika says:

          Precisely M4ce. That’s the only reason. If an adult felt like screaming about anything, they’d be kicked outm, too. Some of us can’t and won’t stomach fast food and we probably don’t want to deal with screamers whilst eating anyway. Plus, I’m just saying! Hah, there’s many a reasons I went to law school instead of dropping out to serve food full time.

      • Childless by Choice-- Where's MY Effing Reward?! says:

        Wow… you can’t seem to comprehend other people wanting to eat in peace.

        Wow… Wanna know what Precious Six-Year-Old looks like to others? Go volunteer in an adult day care center, where grownups act the way your Precious Little Man/Princess does. Better yet, make a career of it, since you obviously have no problem with such behavior.

        Wow… what hypocrisy!

  25. wombo says:

    Either “On a plane” or “Any public transport” should have been added. There is bound to be atleast one babies, and if there is.. It will be screaming, crying sobbing, or whatever they do that makes noises. And as stated above i definitily agree that atleast on planes they should give shots with sedatives.

  26. Arthur Eld says:

    That is so true

  27. Childless by Choice-- Where's MY Effing Reward?! says:

    I’ll add my vote to “at the library”. Not just screaming, but that flat-footed galumphing small children do that makes a 40-pound kid sound like an elephant going for a land-speed record.

    And on any college campus, if you can believe that. One of the few places you’d think you’d have respite from the screechy little things.

    Back in the day, the Cinemark pre-movie cartoons advised shutting up wailing babies as well as one’s personal phone. Why did they take that out? Were they worried they might, oh lawdy, OFFEND someone by suggesting common frigging courtesy?

    If you’re not intelligent enough to piece together the idea that not everyone wants to hear your precious little angel maintain dog-calling-frequency high notes, you are not fit to reproduce. Train that thing or keep it crated when you go out. Simple.

  28. daddy says:

    OMFG! Kids scream, what a revelation! After reading all of these people whining about the possibility of encountering a screaming child I’m probably going to be LESS concerned with whether or not the screaming is bothering anyone else, being that those most likely to be annoyed seem to have zero empathy for parents.

    New parents have to be able to live their lives too, and sitters are often expensive and hard to find.

    When we go to the movies with the kid, we know full well that if there is a crying fit, one of us is going to have to take our daughter outside until she calms down. If you can’t handle the 10-15 seconds of screaming it takes for me to pick up the kid and leave the theatre, well, too bad. Being a part of society means sometimes putting up with things that you don’t love, and hopefully doing it politely. If parents are doing what they can, within reason, to be considerate of other people in their vicinity, you ought to have some understanding of where they are coming from.

    • Kalomex says:

      Actually, I don’t think anyone was talking about parents who have the common decency to take their screaming kids outside within a reasonable length of time. I personally hate the high pitched screeching of children – it’s far more grating than the lower pitched shouting of adults. But if you actually do something about your child screaming, then well done – have a medal for being a decent parent.

      The kind of parents that the people here are talking about are the ones that instead of picking up their child and leaving when it starts trying to burst everyone else’s eardrums, just sit there and say ‘oh, don’t do that precious twinkle snowflake’, or even worse, just ignore it and expect everyone else to be okay with it. The parents everyone is complaining about are the ones who are NOT taking reasonable steps to be considerate of other people in their vicinity.

      And by default, anyone who refuses to take reasonable steps to be considerate of everyone around them (ie, by not doing anything about their screaming child), does not deserve to be shown any consideration in kind. Total kudos to the restaurant Erika used to work at, where people wielding babies are relegated to a corner where they won’t be bothering anyone else.

      Also, I wish to dispute your remark of ‘new parents have to be able to live their lives too’. When you choose to have a child, that comes with an obligation to put that child first, and if that means you have to sacrifice other things that you like doing, then that’s part and parcel of being a parent.

      You can’t just drag the kid along to whatever you want to do, and then ignore the kid when it starts screaming, just because you aren’t done yet. If what you want to do isn’t suitable for the child or you can’t find a babysitter, then guess what? You have to miss out until you can make suitable arrangements. That’s what happens when you have a child and accept the responsibility that comes with it.

      Want to live your life without responsibility, to do whatever you want, whenever you want, however you want? Don’t have a kid.

  29. phronsie says:

    In WalMart = 100%

  30. James says:

    There’s one section that was left out – my absolute favorite, is in the middle of a bookstore while you’re trying to read or browse >:(


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