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Why people think I’m a lesbian.



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Why people think I’m a lesbian.

Graph by: xGothiChickx via Graph Jam Builder

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  1. erich says:

    shouldn’t this be on failblog?

  2. Todd says:

    No one thinks I’m a lesbian.

    Any women want a real man, look me up.

  3. humanflea23 says:

    hating twilight doesn’t make you a lesbian, it makes you human

  4. m4573rz3r0 says:

    I can relate to this graph…

  5. sprent2922 says:

    wish I could find a woman like that. I’m fairly certain they’re an endangered species.

    • Shin says:

      I actually know one. She uses Linux on her computer but has Windows on another drive just for games and compatibility issues. She has a Swiss Army Knife with about twenty tools. She knows ancient Greek and Roman mythology better than I do, and I’m a mythology geek. She’s studying science. And she even looks totally hot, though also quite nerdy, which however just makes her even hotter.

    • lmcfiesty says:

      women like that exist in mass quanities, but they are lesbians, like me!

  6. Captain Obvous says:

    Oh, look, another twilight related submission.
    ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz………

    • Sasquatch says:

      at least it’s kind of bashing Twilight…

      • boon says:

        You FAIL!
        All other posts were bashing twilight too.

        • Starlinguk says:

          Yup. You know why there’s so much Twilight bashing? Not because everybody hates Twilight, but because certain Twilight fans are so much fun to wind up! If you stopped reacting like this, people would get bored.

          As for On Topic, people think I’m a lesbian because I’m a woman who is married to a woman. It’s a dead giveaway, that :P

  7. Sasquatch says:

    If only I knew someone like that. I don’t think I even know a girl that plays 1st person shooters. Or dislikes Twilight.

  8. babe (pig in the city) says:

    ARE you a lesbian?

  9. Kelly says:

    huh? how does twilight relate to this matter? i like the books but i never considered them… as a symbol for straightness.

    people often think i´m a lesbian for liking boy things, which doesn´t include twilight by any means.

    • tyler says:

      That’s because you LIKE Twilight.
      THINK.
      TRY HARDER.
      I KNOW YOU’LL COME UP WITH ONE EVENTUALLY!

    • katdemon♥fire says:

      Because the twilight fan base is composed almost entirely of idiots. And a large portion of those idiots are narrow minded and think “if you don’t think Edward is hot, you must not like guys”
      Which is quite a fallacy, the dude they have playing him comes just short of hideous.

      • Starlinguk says:

        Oy! I’m not a Twilight fan, but I know a lot of bright people who are (they like reading a light bit of fluff between War and Peace and Sense and Sensibility), although they don’t fly off the handle at people who don’t like Twilight.

        • strawberryberry says:

          personally I do like Twilight, as like you said “fluff between war and peace and sense and sensibility” its nice to read something where you dont have to think every once and awhile.
          …that and I just consider it a gag novel…

        • katdemon♥fire says:

          That’s why I said almost. And when I said idiots I meant the people who NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT IT, which also describes a lot of the people who bash it.
          The idiots are the ones who do nothing but talk about Robert Pattinson, and can’t see him for what he is (a really BAD actor who doesn’t actually look like the dude he’s playing,) or they talk about how amazing the book is, (and that’s all they’ve ever willingly read,) and then they Say To KIll a Mockingbird sucks, and say that Stephen King (of all people) is jealous of Stephanie Meyer’s idea and how he didn’t think of it first. (While ignoring Salem’s Lot…)
          The people you’ve met, are a minority, and you’re lucky to know mostly the minority. I’m sorry if I offended you or your friends.

          • tyler says:

            -pukes- PEOPLE SAY THOSE THINGS?!

          • noelle_nightflower says:

            o-o people say that about Stephen King!?? STEPHEN KING?!!??!
            gah. They’ve never read a book besides Twilight in their entire lives!
            I feel bad for them

            • Aaron says:

              I heard the author of Twilight is coming out w/ a fifth book and it’s gonna be a huge thing. People are gonna open it to read and it will be better than the other ones, know why? It’ll be 500 pages of nothing.

  10. Nope says:

    Yeah, girls like this exist all over the place. You’re not special, sweetheart

  11. Doom. says:

    AH LOVES IT!

  12. Windrose says:

    Point one: This chart does not provide enough information for a conclusion to be drawn about the submitter’s sexual preference.

    Point two: Females who love first person shooters and don’t go for mushy vampire love stories may not be thin, blond, or beautiful. I said MAY NOT, not will not. To find a person who fits the profile, you must open yourself to the person within, and accept the physical however you find it. Perhaps together you can both improve spiritually, physically, and at first person shooters. Just a thought.

  13. Kat says:

    Are you my duppelganger?

  14. Higgens says:

    All I hear is a bunch of BAAAAAW!

  15. Wolverines!!! says:

    MARRY ME, PLEASE!

  16. Wasp says:

    I find it kind of odd that this is coming from a girl with the username “Gothchick”…..many things odd, in fact. :|

    • Eddy says:

      Nah, just cliche. Its the goth-chicks who get their panties in a bunch about hating Twilight because people are constantly assuming that they might like it in the first place.

      Likewise with the word “like.”

      • katdemon♥fire says:

        That’s actually not true, Eddy; most of the people I know who “get their panties in a bunch” hating twilight are guys who are merely fed up with hearing about it. Most of the girls I know either like twilight, or have read it but really don’t care that much.

        • tyler says:

          I’ve read it, and get my panties in a bunch because I find the series disgusting, shallow, and think that if THIS many people can’t see through the fact that this is little more than a dumb fantasy about an immortal creature (definitely not a vampire) who is consistently abusive to his significant other, and it makes me angry. :/
          The fangirls just make it *SO* much worse.

          • katdemon♥fire says:

            It’s a fanfic, about someone’s oc. I wouldn’t say he’s abusive, just paranoid and unhealthily stalkerish. (haha, one of the spelling suggestions was lickerish.) I think that we should all quit bitching about the book, and instead focus on the terrible acting, we havn’t tried that yet and maybe people will listen.

            • Hoopy Frood says:

              I think some of the terrible acting comes from the fact that the guy playing Edward hates the books, too.

              And you’re right about it being a fanfic. I’ve noticed that the majority of Twilight fans also gush about the “wonderful” (and I mean WORST) fanfics on a certain website. They tend toward Mary Sue-filled tripe.

              Personally, I don’t like Twilight because, as an editor, I find it poorly written and dull. The concept is mildly interesting, but the execution is awful.

            • sedork says:

              Bad acting for sure. Ever seen Kristen Stewart be mildly interesting?

            • lunamorgan says:

              No. I disagree. He’s pretty much emotionally abusive. Like, normal men don’t remove car engines to keep women from visiting other men. That’s not really cool.

        • Eddy says:

          Really? You must only know teenage girls.

      • noelle_nightflower says:

        that reminds me of southpark horribly :D
        I can’t go into a hot topic anymore just because every time I see a poster of twilight, I think of sparkling guys and laugh till I can’t stand up

  17. Shikei says:

    Surely your best friend saying you’re her lover makes it perfectly logical that people would mistake you for a lesbian, and therefore pointless to make a graph about it. Unless you’re actually a man.

  18. Kendra says:

    Ha ha this graph fits me perfectly XD

  19. Andromeda says:

    yess I know exactly how your feel hahaha…i’ve had a guy i like ask me if i was a lesbian…newhhh

  20. AliceSin says:

    sweet zombie jesus…this graph also = me.

  21. HellHathNoFury says:

    Sounds to me like someone’s friend is an attention whore and needs to grow up a bit.

  22. Justin says:

    This graph is full of fail

    • Karissa says:

      Why?

      • Ruben says:

        Mebbeh because it describes every girl who plays an FPS and thinks they’re unique because of it. Plus every guy on here drools over a girl who stands out, only to find out that there are so many like her, thus rendering her uniqueness MOOT.

  23. Syrp says:

    Wow. Coolest chick ever, right?

  24. Lesbidyke says:

    Hey, that fits the profile of my gf, perfectly. hahaha, I am such a lucky woman

  25. ElfOwl says:

    Heh, for me it’s a proficiency with power tools, short hair, and a penchant for comfortable shoes.

  26. Lily says:

    You forgot “My short haircut”

  27. Mao says:

    Huh?

  28. Thomas says:

    this graph is WIN

  29. Estelle says:

    Hairy armpits make me assume INSTANTLY that a girl is a lesbian. INSTANTLY.
    That is about the only thing that makes me assume lesbian-ness.

    • ladykitteh says:

      Or maybe she doesn’t bother. My sister-in-law (straight, mother of 2 and very Christian to boot) doesn’t shave anything (or at least, I know she doesn’t shave her armpits or legs because I’ve seen them – don’t know about the rest :P ) because she just doesn’t care about the whole beauty ideal thing. And no, her husband doesn’t mind at all!

      Did you instantly assume that Julia Roberts was a lesbian too when she appeared at the premiere of Notting Hill with hairy armpits?

      • Karissa says:

        “Hippy” and “Lesbian” are not synonymous. I would think a woman who doesn’t shave is a hippy, but not necessarily a lesbian.

        • Hoopy Frood says:

          Same here, Karissa.

          Most lesbians I know actually shave their underarms and legs almost obsessively. I’m guessing it’s because they still care about what they look like and how attractive they are to their partner.

    • erich says:

      there are quite a few people in the vegetarian community who prefer their own armpits au naturel. my aunt, for one.

      of course, this is a complete turn-off, as are people who choose not to eat meat when not held at gunpoint.

    • Devylan says:

      i don’t always shave my armpits or my legs, and i’m happily married to a man. yes, i’m a woman.

  30. tara says:

    Junior high/high school nostalgia, much? Practically every straight girl I knew said they were lovers with some other chick as the joking way of saying they were extremely close friends. How have so many people missed this, or is everyone else reading this too old to remember that kind of thing?

    Graph win with a hint of nostalgia fun. ^_^

    • tyler says:

      I’ve heard it so many times that it’s already old, and I’m only 16.

      • Wolfe says:

        i no the feeling. i hardly meet girls who don’t pretend like they are lesbians for attention.

        • [[AM3L!A]] says:

          Mmm. ‘Tis a real shame for actual lesbians… -cough- myself. -Cough-

          • FadedLY says:

            No kidding. I guess that’s how the word “lesbian” became synonymous with “drunken giggly hawt college girlygirl”.

            It’s incredibly stupid and debasing. Can I go back to being an abomination from Satan because of my homosexuality? Please, pretty please?

            • Zoe says:

              yeah, I wish I could too. I’d rather be known as a flannel wearing- boy-punching, future mechanic etc. than a girly slut.

  31. k says:

    god dammit this graph made me cringe its so fail, how did this get on the front page?

  32. badcat says:

    If those are the criteria, I guess I’m a male lesbian.

  33. suze says:

    I know how you feel.. people think I’m a lesbian just cause I have sex with other girls.

  34. Lia says:

    my best friend tells people that I’m her lover too

  35. Who voted for this? says:

    Personal reference graphs are not funny.

  36. Kailey says:

    Oh my God. This graph=story of my life.

  37. Mariachi says:

    Graph = not funny.

  38. Rohvannyn says:

    I think it’s funny! But then again, I’ve been straight, and been bi, and both times have been taken for lesbian (or gay male, which was irritating) so this makes me laugh.

    And yes, Twilight is just THAT crappy. I just think it’s immature so usually ignore it.

    Is that you, Kat?

    • Doc says:

      You can’t switch between straight or bi. You are either straight, or bi, with no “floating” in-between. So if you have ever dated someone of the same gender and liked it, while keeping a preference for someone of the opposite gender, surprise! You’re bi. No going back.

      • Starlinguk says:

        I can imagine that you’d want to call yourself hetero, though. All the stick you get when you’re not. Geez.

      • Hoopy Frood says:

        Well, there IS bi-curious, which means you’re intrigued and may try the same-sex thing for a while. Some find out they’re bi, some realize they’re not actually into the same gender beyond the initial curiosity.

        But you’re right, you can’t switch sexuality like that. You’re either straight, or bi, or gay. Or “pansexual,” but that’s something I don’t feel qualified to explain.

      • lunamorgan says:

        Um. Actually, if you’ve ever done any research on modern theories of sexuality, you can. It isn’t a choice, per se, but rather you simply sit at different points on the scale at different points in life. You may at one point find yourself attracted to the opposite sex while later finding yourself exclusively attracted to the same sex.

    • Devylan says:

      You’ve “been straight, and been bi?” So, now have you *decided* to be a lesbian? Last I checked you’re born one way or another. I, for instance, am bi. Although, I don’t like labels and would rather just say that I fall for who I fall for despite gender, but for some reason that’s too complicated for most people to understand.

      • Original Andrea says:

        Weird, hey?

        “Oh, you’re bi, so you, like, like everyone?”

        Not that I am, but I’d imagine one might have to deal with stupid comments like that.

  39. Doc says:

    I’m tired of people assuming my twin is my lesbian girlfriend instead of my sister just because I kiss her and hug her before she leaves for anything. :/

    • JKatkina says:

      Ahh! XD I’m stick of people mistaking my lesbian girlfriend for my sister because we walk around holding hands!

  40. Mika says:

    People probably think I’m a lesbian cause I’m a woman who has a girlfriend. I know its a total leap of faith…

  41. Starlinguk says:

    An awful lot of people seem to have completely lost sight of the fact that these graphs are funny because they’re generalisations or “confirmations” of prejudices. Not because they’re hard facts.

    • papajon says:

      That doesn’t automatically make them funny. Most seem more observational than anything else.

      • Starlinguk says:

        It doesn’t make them funny, nope (didn’t think this one was, really), but that doesn’t mean they should be taken as a personal insult.

  42. Earbrass says:

    I have never heard of “Twilight”. Do I win a prize? Or is this normal for someone who is neither American nor under 20?

    • Jamie says:

      You do win!!!!! Congrats!!! You get nothing!!!!! Congrats!!!!

    • Hoopy Frood says:

      Never heard of “Twilight”?

      Count yourself blessed.

    • MyssKytty says:

      OMG… you win. Count yourself very, very blessed (or lucky, if you’re an atheist) and don’t bother checking it out. It’s a very stupid book (And even worse movie) about a psychotic, paranoid, abusive vampire that sparkles in the sunlight, with the most obnoxious fan base ever. -__- Not that big a deal.

  43. Stephanie says:

    Anyone else get annoyed when girls have to point out that they’re, you know, totally not girly? So you like things that aren’t typical feminine. Who cares?

    • kemperboyd says:

      I think you TOTALLY missed the joke.

    • Mariachi says:

      agreed

    • Devylan says:

      Yeah, I do get slightly annoyed by this. Despite the fact that I am not typical in many ways, I still celebrate the fact that I am all woman and wouldn’t have it any other way, thankyouverymuch. For instance, a chick I know cried to me over losing her job recently and blamed her emotional outburst on her “time of the month” as though it was a bad thing for her to get emotional. No, it’s not a bad thing. There is nothing wrong with being an emotional woman. Accept who you are and love it!

  44. Dev says:

    Methinks thou doth protest too much, gothichick.

  45. maddie says:

    YAY! another girl that hates Twilight! high five.

  46. Sunshine says:

    wow. not funny at all.

  47. 3m0.n3rd says:

    that is sooooo me!!!! :P

  48. Azkyroth says:

    Where does “pubic hair stuck in my teeth” come in?

  49. jack says:

    or your a goth

  50. Name (required) says:

    We need better quality control, this unfunny unintentional trollbait doesn’t belong on front page.
    Long story short, this isn’t our style of humour. Universals are our tools of the trade. Who are you, xGothiChickx? Forgive me if this seems argument ad hominid, but attention whoring how mannish you and your girlfriend are doesn’t strike anyone as funny. Because no one knows who you are, and no one really cares. And I’d rather not see graphjam reduced to humour squeezed from personal reference on every graph.

  51. Tyler says:

    Piss off, you’re a jackass.

  52. Ruben says:

    Really, you fu(king troll, STFU.

  53. lbl03c says:

    I actually loled. Well done.

  54. Kitty says:

    far as I know, i’ve never been considered a lesbian for liking guy things. they think your a lesbian when you dress like a BUTCH and like guy things. I like them but I’m hot… so i get lots of boy(s) attention.

  55. Kitty says:

    I used the wrong “you’re”.

    don’t hurt me.

  56. Crystal Kyuketsuki says:

    Replace the red zone with “I hate being forced to go to church” and you have me.

    (Although I just plain and simple play video games, not shooter ones)

    • MyssKytty says:

      And me! I’m an atheist in a family of stark-raving Christians, so I’m stuck parking by butt in a pew for two hours every Sunday while the pastor babbles on and on and on ad infineum. I know what you mean.

  57. Cristina says:

    the I hate twilight section should be a LOT bigger…

  58. wesley says:

    you hate twilite!? u rock awsomely!!edward sucks! i hate twilite! im a girl oh we have to be soo girly ooo! (saying in a mocking voice) im a tomboy and i HATE our girly reputation! its stupid so good 4 u ur just like me!

    • itwasadarkandstormynight says:

      For all the people who think that Twilight’s fanbase is made up of idiots, look what its hate base consists of.

  59. @yahoo says:

    They probably think you’re a lesbian because you look like a man. =D

  60. Kuki says:

    I can relate to this graph.
    And seeing as how my best friend showed me this and she posted on here… YOU’RE MY LESBIAN LOVER!! ♥
    Whoo =) Feels good to question your taste in relationships.

  61. Jaclyn says:

    Man, I’m so sick of you chicks.
    Instead of advertising all of these “wonderful” things about you, can you do us a favour and just go back to the kitchen?
    The real girls (you know, the ones who don’t feel the need to jump up and scream ‘oh my god I act like a boy!’) could use sandwiches.

  62. sam says:

    TWILIGHT SUCKED it dosn’t matter if ur a woman or a man

  63. Kathryn says:

    Bahaha this is fantastic and true for a lot of people. Including me.

  64. Des Blumunky says:

    I share each of these traits. I think the strangest part of having everyone think I was a lesbian throughout high school is the man I’m going to be marrying. Our gender roles are so reversed, I joke that we’re both gay and that’s why it works out so well between us. There’s nothing like being a frighteningly manly woman and marrying a man who watches chick-flicks and is afraid of bugs.

  65. Banana says:

    The majority of this graph should be because you’ve never had a boyfriend. I understand that you think it’s “cool” to be more a man’s woman but that’s not what guys find attractive.

    Always the best friend and never the girl friend, huh?

  66. Jadem says:

    And everything but the red applies to me……..

  67. Divvums says:

    Good lord, it’s so true.

  68. rory says:

    Hahaha I think this is hilarious

  69. flash1974 says:

    i love lesbians licking (non stick) frying pans

  70. SallyBones38 says:

    Minus the last one, that sounds like me too. I can agree with you.

  71. Grace says:

    I read the Twilight books as my sister has them. It was the Easter holidays and I had nothing to do, the plot is boring and the blurb gives to much away. I know people know that Twilight is about vampires but still, It’s kind of stupid. The movie is worth a meh, the only part worth watching is the fight at the end. I also I have a certain liking for the cactus.
    Ok now going completey off topic and saying this.
    As a joke me and my best friend said we were lovers, by the end of the day me and my friend were asked, “Oh my god, I can’t believe you and Beth (my friends name) are getting married and moving to China”. We were quite amused and now refer to it as the chinese whispers incedent. Sorry for my increasingly long comment but I felt like typing. Any way bye.

    P.S (Even though this isn’t even a letter)

    I spent ages looking for spelling fails and I can guarantee one or two and if you find them, tell me.

  72. lawlercoasters says:

    Ugh. This whole post opened up a can of worms for pre-teen /teenage girls who want a little extra penis in their life to say “OMFG THAT R LEIK SoooooOOOOOOOoooo TTLLY MI!”

    If only someone would smack these girls, explain to them they arent special just because they have interests that MANY other girls have. There’s a rly hot girl counterstrike team in Sweden. Considering they are Swedes I can pretty much say with all certainty none of the girls posting on this forum are as hot as those girls.

    Get over yourself, ladies. Back to the kitchen with haste!

  73. Nia says:

    This was retarded…:P

  74. KAWCK says:

    Hating twilight is the best thing you can do with your life. if you dont hate it. you are obviously a… there isnt a bad enough word to describe those people!

  75. francisca says:

    hi thanks for share,i always came to visit ur Blog:)

  76. Zakcjhg says:

    I want to marry you.

  77. LadyOfWolves says:

    ROFL! That has happened to me before. Good old gorey movies, Gears of War, Halo3 (I am THE Team Doubles partner of my boyfriend, Aimless1derer.) I have always had guy friends, never made any friends that were girls. Oh Paintball, not a chick sport, LOVE IT!. To everyone who thinks this should be on fail blog… Why? There is no failure at all. Just failure on peoples parts for stereotyping lezzies. Sheesh.

  78. Me says:

    wow, that wasn’t retarded at all.

  79. SomalianPirate says:

    MARRY ME!!

  80. griffin says:

    My friends always they love each other. It changes everyday. So so annoying. Ah well
    But it’s so funny when i here boys speaking of a shooting game and i add something, it’s like they’ve never seen a girl before!

  81. Cookie says:

    Lol,I find it funny that this actually describes me xD

  82. 602p says:

    LIKE this like like this like?


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