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Typical Episode of House, M.D.



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Typical Episode of House, M.D.

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  1. Jmz says:

    Wonder if that has anything to do with the fact the it’s an hour-long show?

  2. Pro says:

    You can summarize the show with the sentence:

    Patient almost dies, but his disease is NEVER ever what first came in mind.

    • mcquackor says:

      How very true…. and yet i love the show and House’s character :P

    • ShadowSplicer says:

      the ‘patent vomits blood’ section should be like 3/4 of the chart!

    • Laura says:

      haha exactly!
      Really, its basically always the same but i still love it…

      Everyone makes a suggestion, all of them are wrong,
      house gives treatment without testing it in the beginning, inturbating, Fight with cuddy and at the end house has a very fantastic idea which is luckily solveable. Hey hey :)

    • V Gard says:

      correction, its never LUPUS. except once.

    • BioRules says:

      Well, sometimes they do get sent home in the first 30, but have to come back cause the doc’s were wrong. Also, I’m sure there is at least one episode where what they thought it was at first, then disregarded, turned out to be right.

      I love House

      • wfreeman says:

        Excactly they get better witin the first 30 but then when they are about to leave they slip into a comma or get sick again!

  3. kabitzin495 says:

    IT’S NOT LUPUS

  4. Zifnab says:

    It’s a tumor. It’s always a tumor. Even when it’s not a tumor, it’s a tumor.

  5. Foamer says:

    Now, now…. on the rerun I somehow ended up watching last night, it was a psychological disorder leading to an illegal heart transplant….

  6. lettertjes says:

    Don’t forget to mention the emergency tracheotomy.

  7. Ruby says:

    Forgot breaking and entering. Also, if it’s season 5 and it’s sweeps, lesbian sex.

  8. stencer says:

    Don’t forget rectal bleeding either!

  9. Dex says:

    I was expecting 90% of the graph to be “It’s a tumor”

  10. kamionek says:

    I was expecting 0% of the graph to be “It’s lupus”

  11. Koko says:

    Even though this chart is true, you guys do realize that the show is mostly about the relationships between people, and only uses “medicine” as a premise to realize that idea.

  12. secha says:

    You forgot the % where someone says It’s Lupus, and someone else saying, IT’S NEVER LUPUS.

  13. likesLSDalot says:

    CANCER!
    It’s always cancer!!

  14. deepeyes says:

    It’s always something easily curable by the end.

    Except when Foreman f’ed up and his treatment killed someone who would have been easily cured.

  15. Ritsu says:

    You SO forgot about Lupus! Everyone thinks the case is Lupus at first!

    • Daemon says:

      Its like
      House “this man has tumours in his brain”
      Team “IT’S LUPUS”

      House “this man has a knife wound to his neck”
      Team “IT’S LUPUS”

  16. Calla says:

    But, but… where’s the huge slice labeled “patient nearly dies due to misdiagnosis”??! That happens at least three times per episode…

  17. Kraas says:

    The smallest percentage should have been “House shaves”.

  18. Captain Obvious says:

    Man, i’ve been put out of a job. :(

    The graph is wrong. There should only be one slice that says: “all of the above”

  19. Me too says:

    There should be a slice where the team is sent to search the patient’s home. A big slice. At my house, we wait for that moment so we can say it with House.

  20. pinklotus says:

    They forgot going blind!!

  21. Jacy says:

    Whoever did this graph has obviously only seen a couple episodes of House. Heart Attack? I can’t remember more than one or two episodes where a patient actually has a heart attack. This graph is totally not funny or correct to anyone who DOES watch the show regularly.

    BAD GRAPH!

  22. Kolora says:

    Jaundice also happens a lot.

    O NOES HIS EYES ARE YELLOW.

  23. Justin says:

    So…. what happened in the one episode where the patient went home in the first thirty minutes? Kind of ruined the last half of the show, didn’t it?

  24. LyssaLovett says:

    House pretty much goes like this: Patient vomits blood/faints, comes in, gets diagnosed, is given medicine, gets better, gets worse, stops breathing, paddles are used, is rediagnosed, is given different medicine, gets even worse, liver fails, is diagnosed with something fatal, is about to be operated on, House has an epiphany in a That’s-So-Raven kind of way, and it’s either an STD or some kind of tumor. House pops pills, the end!

    Regardless, I love House with all my heart and soul. :)

  25. Mauricio Ramirez says:

    This is the best thread ever!

  26. barbara says:

    you forget to say : ” O% of cases : pacient has lupus “

  27. Mariel says:

    A more accurate representation:

    Patients that tell the truth ~5%
    Patients that lie, and eventually fess up ~10%
    Patients that lie, and House calls them out/embarasses them ~85%

  28. Kiwi says:

    I’d rather say ‘cardiac or respiratory arrest’, not heart attack ;) ))

  29. Camero says:

    How about the predictable suggestion of “sarcoidosis” as a possible diagnosis…I swear it’s in 47% of all episodes!

    • Daemon says:

      i think they choose several diseases and use them repeatedly in one series then choose a new set for the next

  30. EMB says:

    I love that far away look House gets when he thinks of the genius solution. Always about 10 mins before the end. Staring…off…into…space. ….Light bulb…

  31. Koko says:

    With all its flaws, the show IMO, is brilliant.

    Even if it does get repetative at times, it is far more interesting then CSI…

  32. Red Alpha Wolf says:

    LUPIS! No… STD! No… TUMOUR!! No wait… it’s something you’ve had since a child that’s come out now…

  33. MissieP says:

    What about oddo- immoon? Come ON people!

  34. jameson says:

    shoulda put another color on the side said patient has lupus and didnt put it in the graph

  35. taatliberty says:

    Don’t forget all the times they think it’s Lupus…

  36. Amy says:

    It’s more often anal bleeding, rather than vomit blood


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