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What I’m thinking during Billy Mays Commercials


song chart memes

What I’m thinking during Billy Mays Commercials

This is what Billy Mays is thinking…

Graph by wacow45, via our GraphJam builder.

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  1. pinga66 says:

    That’s useless!

  2. bong says:

    What i’m thinking watching graphjam submissions.

    1) Wow that sucks, FAIL
    2) These graphmakers must be noobs
    3) Why am i even coming to this site ?

  3. squeebles says:

    Billy Mays doesn’t YELL. He speaks loudly to project himself to his audience and make you excited about whatever he’s selling. THAT’S WHY HE’S THE BEST! D:<

  4. Gregg says:

    STFU and get off my TV !

  5. Pogonip says:

    The poor man is hard of hearing. The best thing to do is to urge him to seek help. A hearing aid would end his agony.

  6. benictionary says:

    By the end of the infomercial, I’m usually in a corner sobbing………. over the phone while I buy the product….

  7. jzimbert says:

    I suffer from voice immodulation! I’m unable to control the pitch or volume of my voice! Also known as Van Horton’s Syndrome, VI is a recognized psycho-medical condition which you may have read about in Newsweek or Cracked Magazine! Numerous prominent Americans suffer from this debilitating disease, including the guy who played Raj on “What’s Happening!!” and tennis great Pete Sampras!

  8. Hell Hath No Fury says:

    True story: my brother told us that in boot camp, since they complained about ‘taps’ being played in the morning, the instructor made recordings of Billy Mays, ‘Janice’ from ‘FRIENDS’ laugh, and Barney theme songs to play over the loudspeakers in the morning. No wonder so many soldiers have Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.

  9. Dave says:

    I would have added the category: “My, what a neatly-trimmed beard! And the color’s so uniform!”

  10. Anonymous says:

    STFU! Billy Mays is the man! He’s a redneck who can invent useful stuff!

  11. phludens says:

    The problem that I have with this graph is that the “Wow, I should Buy That” and the “That’s Useless!” sections are Equal….

  12. madcow says:

    That is EXACTLY what I always think.

  13. Assatian says:

    When I See The Big City Slider Commercial, I Pretend He’s Yelling Big Shitty Slider.

  14. grande says:

    I thought it was hilarious because that’s exactly what i ask myself WHY IS HE ALWAYS YELLING?!?!

  15. britta says:

    I always think: Man what fun it would be to have him as a librarian.

  16. Jeff says:

    I always wondered if he’s from Pittsburgh. That accent tags him as Western PA.

  17. Anon says:

    Im going to miss his yelling :[ R.i.p

  18. ME says:

    NOOO BILLLY!!!! WHY DID YOU DIE!?!?!?!?

  19. puppy77788 says:

    Dont insult Billy Mays. He was an awesome man. The show pitchmen is the best EVER.

    R.I.P.
    Billy Mays

  20. caroline says:

    My friend went on Marry Your Favorite Character.com (MYFC.com) and married Billy Mays


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