What I’m thinking during Billy Mays Commercials

What I’m thinking during Billy Mays Commercials
This is what Billy Mays is thinking…
Graph by wacow45, via our GraphJam builder.
Make your own using our Graph Builder or upload your own files, images or videos. All our charts are user-submitted.
« Previous Things That Happen on LOST | Probability of Food Spill in Terms of Shirt Price Next »

What I’m thinking during Billy Mays Commercials
This is what Billy Mays is thinking…
Graph by wacow45, via our GraphJam builder.
That’s useless!
STOP YELLING!
“Stop Rhyming ALL the time!”
i thinks he MADE me deaf!
now it just sounds like he’s whispering.
HAHA AS SOON AS I READ THIS BILLY MAYS STARTED YELLING IN MY SURROUND SOUND
Nobody every promised you a rose garden.
or success
What i’m thinking watching graphjam submissions.
1) Wow that sucks, FAIL
2) These graphmakers must be noobs
3) Why am i even coming to this site ?
What Im thinking while I read that:
1) No one cares what you think
2) Your 3rd question is a good one. Why are you here? Go away.
3) This kind of attitude is why you have no friends.
exactly, and BTW, billy mays is better than the guy from the shamwow commercial…
Oh my god, the guy in the Shamwow commercial looks like a creepy stalker-rapist, whereas Billy Mays reminds me of Al from Home Improvement. When not yelling.
Vince the ShamWow guy is even worse in the new Slap Chop commercial. He makes it sound like humanity never existed until the Slap Chop was invented, and you’re not a real person unless you own one.
that is because you don’t.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-A9fmnAsgdg
best shamwow parody. “soft enough to caress a baby, strong enough to smother it!”
You’re gonna love my nuts!
shamwow guy is mega creepy. the eyebrow thing, and the microphone. enough to give you nightmares.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure he’s on the Most Wanted list.
i thought that i was the only one who thought of Al from Home Improvement.
wait- he’s NOT Al from home improvement?
Not to mention Vince is a retard. “White cheese, yellow cheese.” WTF?
billy mays is dead and the sham wow guy is in jail. intresting…..
Ah, but he could be faking it to get a rise out of you.
cool.u go girl/boy!!!!
Billy Mays doesn’t YELL. He speaks loudly to project himself to his audience and make you excited about whatever he’s selling. THAT’S WHY HE’S THE BEST! D:<
I honestly think it’s because most of the products are aimed at elderly buyers, who are hard of hearing.
WHAT? COULD YOU SPEAK UP? YOUR TEXT ISN’T LOUD ENOUGH FOR MY DEAF EYES!
STFU and get off my TV !
The poor man is hard of hearing. The best thing to do is to urge him to seek help. A hearing aid would end his agony.
By the end of the infomercial, I’m usually in a corner sobbing………. over the phone while I buy the product….
You really like them ellipses, don’tcha? :p
I suffer from voice immodulation! I’m unable to control the pitch or volume of my voice! Also known as Van Horton’s Syndrome, VI is a recognized psycho-medical condition which you may have read about in Newsweek or Cracked Magazine! Numerous prominent Americans suffer from this debilitating disease, including the guy who played Raj on “What’s Happening!!” and tennis great Pete Sampras!
people who suffer from voice immodulation should have to write in all caps.
True story: my brother told us that in boot camp, since they complained about ‘taps’ being played in the morning, the instructor made recordings of Billy Mays, ‘Janice’ from ‘FRIENDS’ laugh, and Barney theme songs to play over the loudspeakers in the morning. No wonder so many soldiers have Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome.
They don’t play “Taps” in the morning. That’s at night. They play….well, something else. Still a funny story, though!
That would be Reveille (I think that’s how it’s spelled).
I would have added the category: “My, what a neatly-trimmed beard! And the color’s so uniform!”
STFU! Billy Mays is the man! He’s a redneck who can invent useful stuff!
The problem that I have with this graph is that the “Wow, I should Buy That” and the “That’s Useless!” sections are Equal….
That is EXACTLY what I always think.
I thought it was hilarious because that’s exactly what i ask myself WHY IS HE ALWAYS YELLING?!?!
I always think: Man what fun it would be to have him as a librarian.
I always wondered if he’s from Pittsburgh. That accent tags him as Western PA.
Im going to miss his yelling :[ R.i.p
NOOO BILLLY!!!! WHY DID YOU DIE!?!?!?!?
Dont insult Billy Mays. He was an awesome man. The show pitchmen is the best EVER.
R.I.P.
Billy Mays
My friend went on Marry Your Favorite Character.com (MYFC.com) and married Billy Mays