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Yep, very true.
If I’ve learned anything it’s that you have to grow some nads! Either open your yap and talk to her or you’ll be here making graphs for the next 40 years.
Uh…not you Dex… that’s just a generalized observation on my part…
Agreed.
but.. but..
According to this graph there is no point to talk to any girls that he doesn’t talk to since they don’t actually like him O_o
If you want a girlfriend, you gotta be a girl’s platonic friend first. Get out and join some clubs, hobby groups, whatever and start talking to girls you may not “like” and you’ll discover that eventually, there will be a nice girl who will like you. The girls you fawn over from afar may not be girls you’ll actually like once you get to know them.
Dangerous advice that… Once you’re platonic friends with a girl and you DO make make your move then you often get the always great “I just don’t see you in that way / Why can’t we just be friends / You’re like a brother to me” comment.
But indeed, getting to know someone can drastically change your first impression of them
“But indeed, getting to know someone can drastically change your first impression of them”
No, your first impression remains your first impression. Your perception of a person whom you’ve known for a while is a later impression.
You’re right. “Making your move” is where guys get into trouble. They are friends with the girl for all of two weeks (ha!) and then immediately think they should become an item. These things take time in most instances. Get to know (on a friend level) plenty of girls who share your values, interests and maturity level. Wait for a girl to show some more-than-platonic interest. That’s the part above where I say “eventually, there will be a nice girl who will like you.” Too many guys jump the gun and think that “going to the next level” should happen right away, like they see in the movies. You have your whole life to be married. Really! Take your time and establish who you are (values, character, interests, goals, etc) and be around girls who are like that by attending your house of worship, participating in hobbies you like (not “chick magnet” ones!) and just be yourself. You’ll find someone.
as a woman, i have to disagree. being friends does not exclude me from dating the person. you may not have liked any of your male friends in that way i guess. if you do date a friend, it may ruin the friendship, but that has not been my experience at all. it’s more likely to end with both people deciding it’s not working out and then just moving back into friendship. however, there is a maturity level that has to be reached before you can successfully pull off being friends with men you have dated. if you are both mature enough to have a relationship that doesn’t end in screaming and revenge, it can be done.
that said, there are times when someone changes drastically from what you thought they were when they begin to date you. sometimes possessiveness and other traits come out can make you decide a person isn’t worthy of your time at all, even as a friend.
i guess what i mean is, everyone’s different. i have dated friends who are still my friends after dating and i have dated friends who i would not ever want to see again.
Well put, Abby Normal. I am a woman and have traveled the route of friend-dating him-friend because we were both mature and realized that we were better off as friends. We mutually decided that it was better for us to be friends. Boys who fawn over women from afar are generally not mature enough to take this route, and neither are girls who get all nasty and spiteful after a break-up.
thats the story of my life if you take out the circle that says “girls who like me”
hahahahaha
Think that this happens to girls as well….
That’s because the majority of people are unlikeable
Myself included. As they say (the voices in my head), 90% of any sample is bound to be crap.
I would have thought that girls who like him would try to talk to him. So he doesnt talk to those girls either? How mean.
Wow. I am way old but when I was younger I would talk to any girl. I am sorry you have a problem with that but you should really try not to get better at this. I always thought if I didn’t spend time talking to women I would have accomplished so much more in life. And have more money. Maybe I should make a chart…and keep it to myself because mine would have no humor. Like this paragraph.
Yeah, you totally should’ve kept that paragraph to yourself.
yep…us girls can be total time vampires……(<– sarcasm…)
Guys like this are why I’m still single. The ones I talk to myself end up as friends. Sigh.
methinks nudging that circle up top down towards the bottom might help your issue a little.
Also, not using a Halo-referencing name online might help too.
If only such circles were as easy to nudge in RL as they are in draw software.
Amen Brother!
Surely that “Girls who like me” circle is way too big.
Be nice.
In the story of mine, the three circles are blatantly smaller. And half of each is made of fake girls anyways.
Yeah, don’t ya just hate how that happens?
Duke Nukem: sh*t happens!!!
And that’s my story too
So, it sounds like there are girls that like you, but then you talk to them and then they don’t like you anymore.
Maybe because they realize your a total jerk. Or they rather just keep you as a friend. I know with me I took the more then friends mistake only once and now I regret it. I don’t know why but things he did were just too geeky and the way he dressed dry sense of humor. I think it’s when you to have the just friends phase is when a girl decides whether or not she wants to take it anywhere. Sometimes women take it a step more only to see the true colors of that person later.
how can it be that you like a girl, she likes you, but you still don’t talk?
Fiona, because he doesn’t know the girl likes him, or vice versa…or both.
Make the yellow circle bigger. Problem solved
What I’ve realized is when you talk to a girl like they are already a friend, like one of your guy friends, makes talking to them easier. Don’t think of girls so much as intimidating, but as an equal. Just chat.
just don’t try to teabag us like your buddies…because we definitely do not have the anatomy to teabag…oh, or head butt is in the boobs….
This is wrong. If some girls who like you are included in the group of girls you like, you definitely would be a lucky guy. Get your thoughts right.
Graphsmith probably blames it on Aspergers, too.
I’d have to include “Girls who wait till I’m seriously involved to tell me the wonderfully dirty things they would’ve done to me.” Like Brian Posehn said. WTF’s with that?
You know it’s not only girls who play mind games it guys as well. We girls should get together and draw circles of: He just wanted to hit it and quit it, Claimed to love me and 5 other girls at the same time, I was just his eye candy, with a whole lot of other things I cannot mention on here!
I think that the girls who like me should be smaller than the girls I like circle.
Just go with the flow and don’t worry about it so much. It’ll happen.
Just try to become the best realization of who you are. Think about your positive traits and strengths and cultivate them. Take care of yourself. Eat healthy, get outdoors, smile to people. No matter how nerdy your hobbies are there are people out there who appreciate them. Try to meet them (online or otherwise) and hang out with them. Becoming someone who is happy about who he/she is is the key thing. Not only to finding a partner, but generally living a meaningful life.
Wait…so according to the graph you only talk to girls you don’t like? Seems like that might be a little counter-productive.
Some of us just have bad luck.
But talking more will help.
There are anuses on both sides of the sexes.
As stated before, some guys just want to sleep around and have all the women.
And some chicks are only interested in the douche bags.
and vise versa
YES. this is the story of my life as well.