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What my parents think I’m doing


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Graph by Taylor Smith

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» 62 TPS Reports

  1. Badwe says:

    I think you got those two titles mixed up… maybe that was just me when i was a kid…

  2. lol says:

    made me lol

    now time to masterbate

  3. Panzer says:

    Uhm…. isn’t this graph backwards?

  4. Czernobog says:

    You never jack off?

    For god’s sake man, do you want your scrotum to pop?

  5. jack mehoff says:

    If I’m gonna be accused of it, might as well have fun…

    *masturbates*

  6. 216 says:

    So…you’re more interested in doing your homework than doing yourself?
    F A I L !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  7. 808 says:

    graph is correct, everyone knows masturbation should be done outside in nature.

  8. Yarcofin says:

    Other way around.

  9. Dododedo says:

    God watches me poo? Oh man, I’m a sinner, and God’s a pervert!

  10. JenniLamb says:

    Haha, true. But it would be a lot easier to read if the key were in the same order of the graph: purple, red, blue, then green.

  11. xylotism says:

    You don’t have to make a graph to justify yourself to us. Just keep it quiet and I won’t say anything.

  12. Ham says:

    Ah, I remember when I was young and stupid and was in deep denial about all the masturbation I did too. Ah, teenagers. Boy they sure have us fooled.

    “…be out in a minute!”

  13. Chinamerican says:

    There needs to be a section for “drugs” in one of the graphs.

  14. Obama says:

    i agree, its quite the opposite in my house

  15. pwner of N00bs says:

    reading porn and jacking off!
    Using the computer to surf porn and jack off.

    The other two you might as well be jacking off

  16. faunablues says:

    “watching tv” and “reading” *could* mean masturbation…

    Both pies are clearly missing sleep, and assuming this guy is a teenager, should take up half of both pies.

    The first pie could be true… some prefer to masturbate in the bathroom. Or on a bus, if you’re ‘808′ or ’spam’.

  17. Ink Dragon says:

    Sounds like how my parents think of my brother

  18. Destin says:

    If you stopped letting them catch you, they wouldn’t think you’re always masturbating.

  19. Shisno says:

    “Homework” slice is too big.

  20. Stereotypo says:

    You should increase the size of the right chart so that it encompasses the chart on the left. Then it becomes a Venn diagram+pie chart explaining that you masturbate 100% of the time, but sometimes you manage to multitask.

  21. Sprite101 says:

    Is it just me or is this backwards. Or is the OP gay?

  22. Caroline says:

    Brilliant! Jacking off WIN!

  23. Zachary says:

    There should be at least a sliver of yellow in the first pie. A big sliver. Cause otherwise… it just seems like he’s lying.

  24. Ham says:

    Yeah, Mom! I’m “playing guitar”.

  25. HostessCupcake says:

    You should do those things WHILE jacking off…

  26. Speedy says:

    Lol I think I’m like the only other person this applies to…

  27. n8 says:

    shouldn’t doing homework be much smaller?

  28. Jenny says:

    You forgot a very large portion on the left for sleeping. At least that’s what I usually end up doing whenever I go up there to do anything else…

  29. m says:

    other way around

  30. KrIsTeN says:

    HAHAHA i cant stop lol *masturbating!!*

  31. ROTFLOL says:

    why does everyone put asterisks around *Masturbating*?

    • rob says:

      so that it doesn’t get bleeped or censored

    • tyler says:

      to indicate that it’s an action in motion, since saying toying with myself in a sentence isn’t very clear, you know? like this
      -glares-
      it seems much more like i would actually glare now, doesn’t it? LIES.

  32. rob says:

    reverse reverse!!

  33. John says:

    Switch them.


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