Comments on: Elevator door close time

By: Tami

Tami — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 04:36:59 +0000

Our library was remodeled at some time past the year 2000, got several new floors, and the elevator door won’t close until you click Door Closed.

Maybe our library could only afford hand-me-down elevators.

By: Christian

Christian — Sun, 31 May 2009 20:41:35 +0000

Because they want to make you believe that you control your situation.

2+2=5. We have always been at war with Eastasia.

By: Malarkeh

Malarkeh — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 00:34:39 +0000

Makes sense to me. :l
Like, if you’re in a scary movie, you’ll press the elevator button 30 times or higher- as if it’ll somehow magically make the doors close faster.
It’s not really stupidity so much as it is hopeless effort and denial of the protagonist and/or minor expendable character(s).

By: MisterMisteh

MisterMisteh — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 05:18:22 +0000

cant believe i’m seeing a real life fail.. in real life!

also, i think the only reason this doesn’t have a full 5 pies is that no one knows how to read this brilliant graph.

By: haley

haley — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 03:24:38 +0000

i ride the creepiest elevator ever on the daily.
this made me smile.

By: murrowcronkite

murrowcronkite — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 18:18:24 +0000

Of course the percieved time goes down with an increase in button pushes.
YOU’RE SPENDING YOUR TIME AND ATTENTION PUSHING THE BUTTON!

By: Lily

Lily — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 16:54:09 +0000

Then why would they even put the button in?

By: Beth

Beth — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 03:41:42 +0000

You are a genius. This is hilarious.

By: siriochan

siriochan — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 14:59:37 +0000

*moment

By: siriochan

siriochan — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 14:59:11 +0000

Nice, I spent some moemnt to understand it, and it’s simply brilliant

By: lololollllllllololololoolloolollol

lololollllllllololololoolloolollol — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 12:32:42 +0000

Actually, I talked with an elevator technician about this magical button. He said that on many elevators the button is only present for show.

By: Max

Max — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 05:36:52 +0000

Really? You should try it the other way. I pressed the “close door” button and was immediately able to cross the street!

By: Joey Y

Joey Y — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 05:30:29 +0000

His comment is doing:
a) nothing
b) making him look dumb

By: Joey Y

Joey Y — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 05:29:06 +0000

No matter how many times I press the “Press To Cross” button at crosswalks, the doors NEVER close.

By: catgirl

catgirl — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 02:54:57 +0000

This is great! I remember a related Dilbert cartoon, and they are waiting for the elevator to get to their floor. Someone pushes the button twice and one of the characters (either Dilbert or Wally) says, “If you push it a third time it goes into ‘hurry’ mode.”

By: catgirl

catgirl — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 02:52:58 +0000

If this were on the failblog site, this could win as burn of the week!

By: danielle

danielle — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 21:40:06 +0000

WTF is your comment doing here?

By: Pretentious White Girl

Pretentious White Girl — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 19:54:52 +0000

Or the button that makes the elevator come to the floor you’re on.

By: RPGod

RPGod — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 18:40:07 +0000

The letter in the parentheses shows what unit you are using. the (s) means seconds.

Knowledge of charts Fail

By: bopalo

bopalo — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:46:36 +0000

actually, i read an article recently in the new yorker about elevators. according to the article, if you are riding in an elevator built in 1996 or later, then for safety reasons the “close door” button does not work. wonder no more!

By: Badge

Badge — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:34:10 +0000

Imagine that, a funny, well made graph that has nothing to do with song lyrics.

By: skatas

skatas — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:32:25 +0000

clever

By: Badge

Badge — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:31:51 +0000

actually the fail appears to be yours

(in Seconds)

By: Liv

Liv — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 17:01:06 +0000

WTF is that (S) doing there? “Time for door to closes?”

Fail.

By: Leak

Leak — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 16:51:16 +0000

Shouldn’t the actual graphs shrink a bit over time? Even mashing a button furiously takes a few milliseconds…

Other than that the graph’s 100% true, Blond-errr-Bloobeard…

By: Usoki

Usoki — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 16:33:38 +0000

Pssh. This is amazing. If you can’t relate to this graph, you need to be more impatient. Seriously, it’s almost inhuman.

By: DoorOpen

DoorOpen — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 16:14:07 +0000

Sometimes after smashing the button 27 times I wonder if it even works..
This graph could use “Perception of A**holeness From Person Running to Catch Elevator”

By: Freddie

Freddie — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:55:20 +0000

LOL, this is one of the best graphs I’ve seen on this site in a long time.

By: Jen

Jen — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:53:24 +0000

This graph makes me lose the will to live.

By: Meh

Meh — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:34:11 +0000

I have never managed to hit the button more than twice before the door closes… Does this just apply to people hitting the button in an attempt to crush the other passengers entering the elevator?

By: Mary

Mary — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 15:17:21 +0000

This is lost on me.

By: Mike C

Mike C — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 14:40:04 +0000

This, kids, is what it looks like when you make a great graph.

By: The L

The L — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 14:35:22 +0000

This could also apply to the “Press To Cross” button at crosswalks.

By: RJ

RJ — Wed, 24 Sep 2008 14:11:29 +0000

I am so out of the “elevator button press” loop. Maybe it is my extreme patience. This graph is lost on me.