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Elevator door close time


song chart memes

Graph by Bloobeard

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» 34 TPS Reports

  1. RJ says:

    I am so out of the “elevator button press” loop. Maybe it is my extreme patience. This graph is lost on me.

  2. The L says:

    This could also apply to the “Press To Cross” button at crosswalks.

  3. Mike C says:

    This, kids, is what it looks like when you make a great graph.

  4. Mary says:

    This is lost on me.

  5. Meh says:

    I have never managed to hit the button more than twice before the door closes… Does this just apply to people hitting the button in an attempt to crush the other passengers entering the elevator?

  6. Jen says:

    This graph makes me lose the will to live.

  7. Freddie says:

    LOL, this is one of the best graphs I’ve seen on this site in a long time.

  8. DoorOpen says:

    Sometimes after smashing the button 27 times I wonder if it even works..
    This graph could use “Perception of A**holeness From Person Running to Catch Elevator”

    • bopalo says:

      actually, i read an article recently in the new yorker about elevators. according to the article, if you are riding in an elevator built in 1996 or later, then for safety reasons the “close door” button does not work. wonder no more!

      • Lily says:

        Then why would they even put the button in?

        • Christian says:

          Because they want to make you believe that you control your situation.

          2+2=5. We have always been at war with Eastasia.

      • Tami says:

        Our library was remodeled at some time past the year 2000, got several new floors, and the elevator door won’t close until you click Door Closed.

        Maybe our library could only afford hand-me-down elevators.

  9. Usoki says:

    Pssh. This is amazing. If you can’t relate to this graph, you need to be more impatient. Seriously, it’s almost inhuman.

  10. Leak says:

    Shouldn’t the actual graphs shrink a bit over time? Even mashing a button furiously takes a few milliseconds…

    Other than that the graph’s 100% true, Blond-errr-Bloobeard…

  11. Liv says:

    WTF is that (S) doing there? “Time for door to closes?”

    Fail.

  12. skatas says:

    clever

  13. Badge says:

    Imagine that, a funny, well made graph that has nothing to do with song lyrics.

  14. catgirl says:

    This is great! I remember a related Dilbert cartoon, and they are waiting for the elevator to get to their floor. Someone pushes the button twice and one of the characters (either Dilbert or Wally) says, “If you push it a third time it goes into ‘hurry’ mode.”

  15. lololollllllllololololoolloolollol says:

    Actually, I talked with an elevator technician about this magical button. He said that on many elevators the button is only present for show.

    :P

  16. siriochan says:

    Nice, I spent some moemnt to understand it, and it’s simply brilliant

  17. Beth says:

    You are a genius. This is hilarious.

  18. murrowcronkite says:

    Of course the percieved time goes down with an increase in button pushes.
    YOU’RE SPENDING YOUR TIME AND ATTENTION PUSHING THE BUTTON!

  19. haley says:

    i ride the creepiest elevator ever on the daily.
    this made me smile.

  20. Malarkeh says:

    Makes sense to me. :l
    Like, if you’re in a scary movie, you’ll press the elevator button 30 times or higher- as if it’ll somehow magically make the doors close faster.
    It’s not really stupidity so much as it is hopeless effort and denial of the protagonist and/or minor expendable character(s).



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